So, another year has just begun and for some reason I've been greeted with a certain wave of anxiety about going forward. There is immense pressure to "start the year off right" to "make this the best one yet", so when I think of all that I have to do within the next year, I become a little uncertain if I can make 2018 the best one yet.
One thing which I briefly mentioned on my Instagram was that I am postponing uploading on my Youtube channel. I have been blogging since 2014 and Youtubing since early 2017, and boy did I underestimate the amount of work it entails. I work part time in a clothes store, have a level exams to prepare for (both artistic and academic subjects) as well as make enough time for my friends, family and boyfriend. All whilst getting enough sleep eating properly and maintaining good mental health. Due to these reasons I will not be uploading Youtube videos but instead putting that effort into my blog and creating great quality content.
"[I] want to look forward to endless nights going out with friends, getting a little too drunk... laughing, and crying, and worrying, and enjoying..."
I also think of certain hurdles I have to overcome this year. Such as taking my driving test which I am truly petrified about. My exams are coming quicker than I want them to and I feel no matter how hard I revise I am not getting to where I want to be in terms of notes and revision. I also have personal issues to take care of as well as face certain people I may not want to and know that in those situations I'm going to have to stand up for myself - which is hard for me as I hate confrontation.
Despite these qualms about the new year I know I have plenty to look forward to. Zante for my first ever girls holiday and well as going to Florida with my family and getting to take my boyfriend for the first time. I have my 19th birthday in October and want to look forward to endless nights going out with friends, getting a little too drunk... laughing, and crying, and worrying, and enjoying.
But isn't that the beauty of the new year. We know there are good and bad times ahead, it's just knowing that we're going to do whatever it takes to enjoy the good times a little more, and worry over the bad times a little less. Hope everyone had a safe and happy NYE, and best wishes for 2018.
PM x